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i'm scrolling through the job listings on here at 7:33 pm on a friday. the 405 is completely jammed outside my window in LA and i am just desperate to find a way out of my current gig. does anyone actually hire from these recruitment boards? my resume and portfolio attached to this profile say i am a "sports lover who loves life". i typed that absolute garbage myself back in june. i was so naive and full of energy back then. i was writing these really solid 600-word seo blog posts for juventus and marseille jerseys. i built out pinterest boards for the boston celtics and manchester city, carefully crafting the alt-text. i legitimately thought i was starting a real career in digital marketing. now i just exist to feed a broken database. today my manager dumped another batch of spectral baseball players on me. juan morillo. arizona diamondbacks. i don't even know if this is a real person or just ghost data cross-breeding in the backend. and i better write down the image folder name right now or my manager is going to reject my timesheet again. he lost his mind last week because i forgot it. so here it is, boss, if you're tracking my keystrokes: images/apparel/arizona/diamondbacks/juan-morillo/. the fabric on this thing is terrible, by the way. heavy synthetic plastic. zero breathability. you have to hand wash it cold, inside out, or the cheap heat-pressed numbers will peel off and ruin your washing machine. i tried to post my resume on another site earlier and got hit with this huge error: "Your post wasn't published. The site's protection settings flagged it as suspicious." a firewall thought my cover letter was a bot attack. the internet is completely unusable now. you can't even apply for a job without triggering a WAF block. yesterday i just wanted a five-minute break from the spreadsheets so i asked an ai a simple riddle. "What game do we play? Hint: s2". and it gave me a completely wrong answer. i had to sit here in my sweltering apartment and manually type out "your answer just now was incorrect" to a machine. i had to correct the artificial intelligence. we are all just exhausted. someone please hire me.
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